Day 339 - Hard questions

We all know our whys not to drink. We repeat them whenever we feel tempted. I should not drink because this and that. I think that whys are really helpful but I’ve come to think of another set of whys which I think are more important in the long run.

We all know why we shouldn’t drink but do we know why we drank too much in the first place?

I think that addiction points to a question waiting to be asked. A question we don’t want to answer because it would force us to do changes to our lives we’re not ready to do.

For me that questing is:

“Do I want to pursue a different career?”.  

For someone else it might be:

“Am I happy in my relationship?” 

or 

“Why does it feel safer for me to fail than to succeed?”.

To avoid answering the hard questions I ask myself harmless questions with answers not forcing me to do anything, really:

“What will make me happy?”

“What are my life goals?”

“How should I find my true love?”

I’m not saying it’s not important to think these things through but these questions pretend to take me forward faster than they do when all it takes to answer them are some canned responses filled with preconceptions of how I want to be. My illustrious self image of how I WANT to be does not always match how I would be being true to myself.

When I stop drinking the question waiting to asked comes forward. I can try to avoid it but sooner or later I will have to deal with it. It is my job to dare to ask, listen to the answer from deep within and act upon whatever the answer might be.