Day 151: Ripples

Like ripples on water,
my determination spreads
in the center an action of self love
sourced from a moment of clarity when I asked myself the question “When was the last time you thought about alcohol without guilt?”

Like ripples on water,
one conscious decision leading to another
Because when I remove the cloud of alcohol, all decisions become conscious. I have no one but myself to blame - it’s just what I choose to do or not to do. It’s scary, but it’s also so thoroughly liberating.

Like ripples on water
The love I’ve chosen to give myself spreads to everyone around me.
The love I give, I feel being returned because alcohol is not clouding my love receptors.
I see the people I love because I’ve chosen to see myself, I see their needs because I’ve chosen to see my needs and I love them because I’ve chosen to love me.

It  all starts in the center with an conscious action of self love to stop drinking and spreads like ripples on water.

Onward and upwards, comrades!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Day 96: Rant on moderation

Image
Photo: Karin Arver The ONLY people that can moderate are the ones who don’t like alcohol that much to begin with. You know the kind of people that don’t like to get tipsy and that forget that they have a bottle of wine at home. We are here because we have proven that we like it too much. We love the buzz and don’t forget that we have alcohol at home. On the contrary we make sure that it’s always around. Taking a break does not magically rewire your brain to not like alcohol - it just shows you that you don’t really need it. If you start again the pattern will come back. I KNOW it’s a scary thought but things gets so much easier if you just accept that you do not really need alcohol in your life. Over and out!
Read more

Day 160: Alcohol the energy waster

Image
Alcohol is supposed to bring us joy in life. But it is actually just a big energy waster. When thinking of it nowadays I just get tired. These are things that I actually wasted time and energy on when drinking: 1) Bad sleep and hangovers. Duh. Many days wasted. 2) Planning how to buy alcohol and get in into the house without anyone noticing the amounts. 3) Getting all the empty bottles OUT of the house without anyone noticing. 4) Excusing why it was not that bad last night to be able to stand my behavior. 5) Practice the quick "inhale"-kiss, on the back of my hand,  so that my partner wouldn't notice my breath. 6) Doing loud and unnecessary household work to mask when I was opening another beer. 7) Planning where to put different, identical, glasses so that I could fill them up independently to make it harder to track how many I've had. 8) Texting people to convince them it's a good idea to go out on a Tuesday. 9) Having the same conversations over and ...
Read more

Day 165 - Breaking the breakout

Image
Sometimes we get reminded that the world is a scary place even if our societies and institutions usually does a good job hiding that from us. The threat of an invisible virus really gets to me, with this creepy feeling that I need to watch where I touch and who I go near. I'm not really scared that the virus will affect my health that much but I'm thinking about the mayhem at the hospitals that probably is about to break loose in a couple of weeks. And I'm thinking about my parents and other elderly that I hope will not catch it or catch it when there are resources at the hospitals. I've sent my parents to the countryside to live there for a while. And my ex-wife is home coughing, after treating someone who had been in Italy,  so I will have the kids at my place for a while. Every party, concert or other event the coming month is cancelled. I've stashed up with food in the fridge and the freezer and I'm gonna be home with the kids this weekend, play games and ...
Read more