Day 156: Regret and moving forward


Many think that REGRET is something that we should avoid. If you mention to someone that you feel regret the usual response is that it's probably not that bad, or that you should look ahead instead of back and not dwell on things that you can not do anything about.

It is true that I shouldn't waste my energy on things I can not change but I think that regret contains very important information: it's a signpost for something I need to change in myself in order to not feel regret for the same thing again. If I only allow myself to feel the regret but not go deeper to understand WHY I feel it,  I will repeat what caused it. Serial actions causing the same regret will transform into self loathing: "What's wrong with me? Why can't I control alcohol?"

I think many of us ended up in this self loathing regret spiral when we were drinking. It's tough to break your own promises over and over again. You feel worthless and it takes a lot of energy to deal with the fact that you're letting yourself and the people around you down. The most beautiful thing with having alcohol problems is that going AF is a very effective way of breaking that regret spiral. If you take away the very source of why you feel regret, you will go lighter on yourself and the moments you regret in the past will fade away. That way you can focus your energy on more important things.

Onward and upwards, comrades!

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